Over the past few years, we’ve spent a lot of time listening. Listening to intended parents who come to us confused or disappointed by how their journey has unfolded. Listening to surrogates who feel under-supported or unclear about what they’ve signed up for. And listening to providers who genuinely want to do better but are operating in a system that does not always reward good practice.
This was the focus of our most recent Growing Connections meeting. It felt important to openly share what we’re seeing and why we believe parts of the way this industry operates need to change if it’s truly going to better serve the people at the centre of it.
The issues we’re seeing across agencies
One of the most consistent themes we hear from intended parents is a lack of clarity. Processes that sound simple at the beginning often become opaque once contracts are signed. Timelines shift without explanation. Costs escalate without warning. Key decisions are made without parents fully understanding the implications for their family, their embryos, or their future child.
We also see wide variation in how agencies recruit and support surrogates. In some cases, screening is rushed or poorly documented. In others, surrogates are given limited independent advice or are not adequately supported once pregnancy begins. This doesn’t just create risk for parents. It creates risk for surrogates, and that matters just as much.
Another issue that comes up again and again is accountability. When something goes wrong, it’s often unclear who is responsible, how concerns should be raised, or what happens next. Some parents tell us they felt silenced or dismissed when they asked reasonable questions. Others only discovered gaps in processes when it was already too late to change course.
None of this applies to every provider, but it applies often enough that we felt it needed to be addressed openly.
What we believe providers should be held to
Surrogacy is complex by nature. Different countries, legal systems, medical standards, and cultural expectations all play a role. But complexity is not an excuse for poor communication, weak processes, or avoidable harm.
At a minimum, we believe providers should be transparent about how they operate, clear about risks and limitations, and consistent in how they support both intended parents and surrogates. There should be documented processes, defined points of accountability, and a genuine willingness to explain decisions rather than deflect them.
Most importantly, providers should be prepared to reflect on feedback and improve. The goal is not perfection. The goal is responsibility.
Why Growing Connections exists
Growing Connections was created as a space for providers who are willing to engage with these conversations, even when they’re uncomfortable. The vision is simple: raise standards across the industry by encouraging better processes, stronger accountability, and more thoughtful care for the people involved.
Our mission is not to police or punish. We are not here to chastise providers who are getting things wrong. We are here to create a framework where improvement is expected, supported and visible. Where doing better is not optional, but part of participating in a professional community.
Being a Growing Connections member means committing to that mindset. It means being open to feedback, willing to review internal processes and prepared to evolve as expectations change.
Verification, and what it is and isn’t
As part of this work, we introduced Provider Verification. A program that provides a clear, structured way to assess whether key baseline processes are in place and whether a provider is prepared to be accountable for how they operate.
Verification is not an endorsement nor a guarantee, and it’s not a marketing badge designed to funnel intended parents in one direction. What it’s meant to be is a tool to help intended parents identify providers who have demonstrated clear processes and accountability.
The criteria we use were developed based on what we consistently see go wrong in real journeys. We elected an independent committee made up of lawyers and IVF specialists from different parts of the world to help identify what responsible and well-run processes should look like in practice. Their role was to challenge assumptions, bring jurisdiction-specific insight, and ensure the criteria reflected real-world legal, medical, and operational considerations, not just ideals. The result is a framework grounded in professional expertise and global perspective, shaped by what actually protects intended parents and surrogates across different systems.
Further reading: Building Trust in Surrogacy: Our Verification Criteria
What happens when a provider doesn’t meet the criteria
Not every provider passes verification the first time. That’s expected. But failing verification does not mean removal from Growing Connections. Providers who don’t meet verification criteria can remain members while they address the gaps identified and improve their processes. This ensures that intended parents and surrogates continue to benefit from a network where providers are supported to operate responsibly. That said, providers who are known to repeatedly operate in ways that put intended parents or surrogates at risk will be removed from the community to protect those at the centre of this work.
Providers who have been verified are also not guaranteed to retain that status indefinitely. Verification is reviewed annually, and we remain open to feedback from the community. If a provider no longer meets the standards, their verified status can be revoked. Verification reflects an ongoing commitment to responsible practices, not a permanent endorsement.
Looking ahead
This is ongoing work. Standards evolve. Expectations change. What mattered five years ago is not always enough today.
Our hope is that by being transparent about what we’re seeing, clear about what we expect, and fair in how we assess providers, we can contribute to a surrogacy landscape that is safer and more humane for everyone involved.
We’ll continue to share updates as Growing Connections and our Provider Verification program evolve. If you have any questions about these and other initiatives, please feel free to reach out.
