by Sam Everingham
Posted on 2021-02-09 at 03:27:50
What is a surrogate?
The word surrogate just means appointed to act in the place of. Surrogacy refers to an arrangement whereby a woman agrees to become pregnant for the purpose of gestating and giving birth to a child for a couple or single person with the intention of giving that child to that person/people once the child is born (also called surrogate pregnancy).
What are the different types of Surrogacy?
Complete/ Gestational surrogacy
The surrogate mother is implanted with an already fertilized embryo which may be produced using in vitro fertilisation (IVF), via the Intended Parents egg and sperm or using a donated or purchased egg (in the case of gay males) or sperm. In this case the pregnant woman makes no genetic contribution to the child. This type of surrogacy is far more common amongst Australians, and is viewed as providing a greater distance between the surrogate mother and the child.
Traditional/ Partial/Straight surrogacy
The gestational surrogate provides the egg for the child and is impregnated with the sperm of the commissioning father (usually through artificial insemination). In these cases, the gestational surrogate is genetically linked to the child but she relinquishes any legal rights of parentage over the child to the commissioning parents.
What types of surrogacy agreements exist?
Altruistic or non-compensated surrogacy arrangements are those where the surrogate agrees to receive no payment or reward, except for medical, legal, travel and other out-of-pocket expenses. In some cases, payment for lost work hours is also allowed. Altruistic surrogacy is legal, albeit tightly regulated in some jurisdictions.
Compensated or commercial surrogacy arrangements are those in which the party seeking a child agree to pay a fee to the surrogate beyond the cost of her medical needs.
What motivates a Surrogate to Carry a Baby?
Contrary to popular belief, surrogates are not all poor women being exploited for their fertility. Many are middle-class women who want to help make families. They come from all walks of life.
The emotions involved in surrogacy are very strong on both sides. Surrogates need to make sure they have appropriate support before choosing surrogacy. Online support groups exist in countries like the US, Australia and the UK for surrogates.
How Do Surrogates Feel About Relinquishing a Child?
Research carried out by the Family and Child Psychology Research Centre at Cambridge University, UK shows that properly screened surrogates rarely have difficulty relinquishing rights to a surrogate child.
Most stories (especially movie dramas) about the subject focus on the problems and conflicts that may arise from surrogacy, but this is very rare in reality. Most surrogate arrangements end without problems, with both the intending parents and the surrogate coming away satisfied.
What sort of people use surrogacy?
In some cases it is the only available option for a couple who wish to have a child that is genetically related to at least one of them. People who choose surrogacy may be:
- heterosexual women who are unable to carry a child due to a range of factors (eg infertility, hysterectomy, absent or poorly functioning ovaries, an absent uterus, a maternal disease which precludes pregnancy, recurrent pregnancy loss, or repeated IVF implantation failures)
- single women or lesbian couples who can’t carry a baby
- single or same-sex partnered men
How do I choose a donor?
If you not using your own eggs or those of a friend, this is another step you must take. In some countries, only altruistic donors are allowed. In some countries donors must be known, in others they must be anonymous. This depends on cultural beliefs and hence laws. There are numerous agencies that provide egg donor services and you should “shop” around.
Egg donors can cost from US$4000 upwards. Previous egg donors often charge higher fees. You will generally get full personality, educational and medical profiles of the egg donor together with photographs. Some agencies also provide videos.
An Egg Donor is a very personal choice. In many cases the egg donor that is chosen results in a successful pregnancy, however some intending parents have had to select a second egg donor later, due to difficulties relating to successfully becoming pregnant.
What is Independent Surrogacy?
There are a number of consumer-run websites and forums that can enable intended parents and surrogates around the world to privately match with each other (eg surrogatefinder.com, surrogacysisters.com). These can be useful resources and can avoid the costs of a surrogacy agency, particularly in countries which do not allow surrogates or intended parents to advertise openly.
However there are dangers inherent in such DIY arrangements for both surrogates and intended parents.
Common risks include
- Surrogates who may have had no psychological screening, STD testing or criminal checks as to their suitability
- Intended parents being asked for unplanned/unreasonable/unlawful payments from surrogates
- Communication problems between surrogates and IPs due to inadequate expectation setting and planning
- Lack of legal planning to ensure transfer of parentage is possible
Each October scores of attendees come together in six different Australian capital cities – singles, couples, gay and heterosexual, some in their twenties, some in their fifties. They share a common goal – to create family with the help of yet unknown angels – donors and surrogates. It is these more complex journeys to parenthood […]
Lawyer, Stewart Dalley of D&S Law, has both lived and professional experience of surrogacy, having represented several people with their surrogacy journeys (domestically and internationally) as well as having three children of his own through surrogacy. Stewart is considered an expert in the field of the laws related to human assisted reproduction, including surrogacy, sperm, […]
I have been working in this field for over a decade and the intended parents who come most unstuck in creating family are those who try to rely solely on social media tips as their manual for family building. While the casual advice from past parents is well-meaning, every journey is different and this is […]